Another extended break, but now I'm back, I'm bad, I'm nation-wide. In this episode, I try to sort out when the Apple II really turned 30...and whether Retro Thing and Retrocomputing Times are going to have to wrestle shirtless to Star Trek fight music. Also, I take a gander at the new Apple ][ Incider game review column before giving a highly professional analysis (read: big bunch of made up nonsense) of the Jobs and Gates interview at the recent All Things Digital conference. The review this month is of a classic Infocom text adventure, Hollywood Hijinx, whose author was put on trial by his fellow employees for goldfish homicide. Finally, I ask your advice about what I should drive to Kansas next month.